Don’t Fall For The First Person You Finally Connect With

don't fall for the first person you meet
Photo by Jep Gambardella

Chances are, your soulmate is not that one person you finally click with on the first date. It is understandable that after enduring multiple failed dates for a long time, finding someone you finally connect with can feel surreal. These moments allow us to wilfully wear the infamous rose-colored glasses because we have a victory under our belts. But, it is still too early to analyze and make logical decisions about this person.

It is essential to pace yourself and be ready to see the flaws even if you are living your fantasy at the moment. There is still plenty of time to get to know them, see who they are, and continue the growth process. Before committing and deciding to be with this person, remember to enjoy the moment, choose logic before emotions, seek guidance from people you trust, don’t overthink it, and pace yourself.

If you find the right person, immerse yourself in the moment. No one is telling you not to have fun. It’s completely understandable to let those emotions carry you away and to be present in the excitement. Going out on more dates is also the perfect way to get to know them better. Just don’t feel the pressure to commit or seal the deal before seeing who they truly are.

Dating can feel like a sprint, but it is a marathon.

While we are all looking towards the finish line, we must remind ourselves that what is meant for us will flow naturally without needing to finalize things early on. Dating should not be viewed as a business deal. Don’t close out a contract in a situation you aren’t fully ready or prepared for.

This is why being logical is essential when dating. I know it can be tough, especially when we are swept away by potential. We tend to let our imagination take over, and we forget about the real world. However, letting our hearts take the wheel can be a recipe for disaster.

If your potential partner does something that does not sit right with you, do not try to excuse it. Understanding your boundaries and what you are willing to endure in a relationship is crucial. You will be able to leave someone if you notice early on that they have certain habits, mannerisms, and philosophies that you don’t agree with.

This is also a great time to understand if they want what you want in the long run. Are they considering getting married someday? Do they want children? Do they want to move away? These are important questions to ask early on, so there aren’t any surprises ahead.

Seeking guidance from those you trust and respect will work wonders. These people will give you loving, honest advice if they recognize something is off with your potential future partner. If you are seriously considering entering a relationship with this person, let family and/or friends meet them. It’s always a good idea to have a fresh set of eyes and perspectives—even when the truth is hard to accept.

Pace yourself. Why rush into something that might not work out and cause you more grief and unwanted drama? Try your best to get to know them because that charming person could be a wolf in disguise. Instead of rushing to partner up, do the unexpected and take things slow. That way, you will be able to gauge and see if they are genuine.

Allowing ourselves to fall for the first person who comes along will only prepare us for imminent heartache. People tend to forget that to have a successful relationship down the line, you need to have a vision of the future and practical standards to get there. Physical attraction without an emotional connection is meaningless, so make sure to go slow and pay attention to what’s happening around you.

Too many of us tend to cling to the person who finally meets our expectations early on. As tempting as it may be to fall for those superficial qualities, they will never be enough without a solid foundation. Just because they say and do all the right things then and there does not mean you will meet one another emotionally and philosophically.

Remember to be smart and patient. Don’t be afraid to analyze the situation before embarking on your journey to love.

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