“You cannot succeed, if you don’t love yourself.”
We all know the saying, in some variation.
It’s drilled into us every time we experience self-doubt, pain and tears. It seems to be the easiest equation: self-love equals success. However, accomplishing it is like trying to convince someone that night time is the warmest looking sky of the day. Doable in the right circumstances and viewpoint, but not guaranteed or easy.
See, what people fail to realize is loving yourself is not genetic or consistent. You are not born with self-love, and it is not a necessity to biologically function. It is a worthy goal to work towards, but it takes time and intense development to accomplish.
Then, when you have attained it, you’re on track for anther crazy rollercoaster. Self-love is the best rollercoaster you can jump on, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy.
Some days you are going to be on top of your own cheerleader pyramid. You are telling everyone who will listen how you kicked that tests ass, you rocked that day at work, and you saw yourself as the goddess that the world knows you are.
However, some days this doesn’t happen.
Some days, nothing fits right, and you can swear you’ve gained 20 pounds in your sleep. Everything seems to be going wrong around you and it becomes a game of self-blame.
It happens to the best and the worst of us. Days where self-love isn’t just far from our mind, it’s living on another continent.
This is okay.
It is okay to have days of self-doubt and self-blame while not feeling a whole bunch of self-love.
People fail to realize that we grow from our hard days, not from our routine ones.
The days that I push myself to get up, get dressed and essentially do life, are the days that show me just how amazing I am. It shows me that while I may not love myself fully today, I truly care about myself to keep moving.
Love and caring for yourself are different, but extremely powerful qualities to have. Both keep you moving, but care is what makes love so special.
When you care about yourself, you eat that meal, you brush your hair and you get your day moving. When you love yourself, you spread that to the world!
Both are beautiful, but sometimes both are not attainable.
So yes, you’re bloated today, but that’s okay. Yes, you ate only junk food because you’re having a hormonal day, but that’s okay. Yes, shit hit the fan a million times today, but that’s okay.
It’s okay to have days that make you struggle and fight for your self-love. This fight gives us fire and purpose.
It reminds us that we are allowed to struggle, because tomorrow you’re going to wake up and be proud that you made it through. You’re going to cheer, because when everything went wrong you still made it through that day.
It’s pretty incredible to know that you can love yourself because of your struggles, not in spite of them.