This Is Me Taking Back Control Of My Body & Sexuality

taking back control of my body
Photo by Polina Kovaleva

Slut-shaming is a practice that has been around for many centuries. It is used to criticize women for the same behavior that is praised in men.

Men are encouraged to increase their body counts, while women are expected to keep theirs as low as possible.

The only possible explanation behind this is the fact we live in a patriarchal society.

The patriarchy has always tried to shape women to care more about men’s opinions and needs.

Women are expected to know how to cook and clean, so they find good husbands, while men are allowed to exist however they please. In many countries, abortion and contraception are illegal, while there are barely any laws that require men to provide for their biological children. If we show too much skin or enjoy consensual sex, we’re slut-shamed. If we cover up and reject men’s sexual advances, we’re “frigid.”

This is why slut-shaming is still so prevalent in our society. It gives misogynistic men additional power to determine our entire worth.

Society sees us as sacred objects that need to be covered and protected. The irony lies in the fact that our bodies have been hyper-sexualized from an early age.

The ideal beauty standards for women are rooted in pedophilia. Some of the most questionable examples are being petite and non-threatening, lack of body hair, and the fashion industry favoring women with little to no curves. Child beauty pageants only feature girls. At school, girls are constantly reminded to obey dress codes so they don’t “distract” their male teachers and classmates from learning. But at the same time, some of the most popular porn categories are teen, barely legal, and schoolgirl.

We don’t need to be protected; we just need attackers to stop.

The minute a woman starts embracing her own sexuality, it’s a problem. She’s called a prostitute, whore, slut, and many other things.

But women are more likely to be shamed for consensual sex than male rapists are for their crimes. Most of the time, we’re the ones blamed for the crimes committed against us. If we wore tight and revealing clothes, we stayed out late, we didn’t step out with a man to protect us.

When we’re not being blamed, we’re usually being accused of lying. If 26 men call a woman a whore, it’s easy to believe. If 26 women call a man a rapist, it’s still yet to be determined. While women get ostracized from the community, male rapists are still allowed to become the President of the United States.

I’m setting myself free from the social norms I’m expected to follow. My IQ doesn’t drop every time I show my assets off. My sex life is a journey I’m allowed to explore without any qualms. It’s a part of my identity, and I love every bit of it. Whether my body count is 0 or 500, it’s no one’s business but my own.

This is me giving myself full autonomy over my body and choices and treating myself like a goddess no matter what.

This is me accessing my divine feminine energy in any way I please and encouraging my fellow sisters to do the same.

This is me reclaiming the word slut.

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