Here’s What I’ve Learned About Playing The Comparison Game

Photo by Pradeep Ranjan - Unsplash

I’m learning that there’s no escaping comparison in this easy-to-put-our-best-selves-out-there culture we live in.

I’m learning that there will always be someone who is better than me. Even on my best days.

I’m learning that comparison brings with it envy and jealousy for a brief moment. But leaves me with self-disappointment for a long time after.

I’m slowly learning to understand that this envy of others can be transformed into self-encouragement.

I’m learning that when someone else is amazing at what they do, at what I wish to do; it doesn’t make me or what I do any less good.

I’m learning that we’ve all been given plenty of space to nurture and build and create something that is purely our own.

I’m learning that although sometimes our work and our art and our words may seem similar on the surface, it’s never the same. Because what people put together comes from a deep, personal part of themselves. And what I put together stems from the deepest, most personal parts of me. And those two can never be the same.

I’m learning how easy it is for comparison to hold me captive. How easy it for its self-destructive lies to bring me down. To make me feel like I’m not good enough. Like what I do or say doesn’t really matter. And that I don’t deserve to take up any space here.

I’m learning how difficult it is to fight these lies. To keep holding on to the truth that every single person on this earth matters; and that includes me.

I’m learning that comparison is vicious. It seeps into our minds taking subconscious control, which sometimes causes me to one-up myself, only to not feel left behind.

I’m learning how important it is to remember that greatness exists in all of us, in equal measure. We can either build on this truth and allow it to lift us higher. Or we succumb to feelings of inferiority when we lose sight of ourselves, and stay fixated on how much better someone else is doing.

I’m learning how it’s never okay to undervalue or underestimate anyone because everyone has their own kind of special that they bring to the table. I’m learning how to show up when people are sharing their work, their art, their stories, and their hearts. It reminds me to move out of my self-created bubble and enter into their world. I’m learning that the negativity of comparison will not thrive in a space where I show up, listen, learn from, affirm and encourage someone else.

I’m learning how I’m not the only one who feels this way. And so, when I build myself up, I’m learning how to lift others up alongside me, in whatever way I can; so that there’s no room for the negativity of comparison anymore.

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