It’s difficult to love yourself in a world that constantly teaches you not to.
A stream of adverts and images greet us every day, featuring sexy and seemingly happy women selling us their bottled joy.
The message is, we love ourselves, so why don’t you? Buy this (insert product/service here), and everything will be better.
And we believe them. Because we want to feel good about ourselves.
Who doesn’t want that?
But more often that not, we buy the make-up, the new clothes, or those breast implants, and nothing changes. We feel exactly the same as we did before, and sometimes, even worse.
This vicious cycle has led to an all time low in our self confidence, self worth, and self love.
And the truth is, society doesn’t want you to love yourself. Because if you do, you won’t buy the bullshit they’re selling any more.
Most of us don’t know where to begin learning to love ourselves. We keep on looking outside ourselves for a magic potion that’s going to solve everything. That’s exactly what happened to me.
But what we don’t realise is, real self love begins within.
And there is no quick fix.
That doesn’t mean that things like getting a makeover, or treating yourself to a new outfit are bad. It just means that if you only focus on external, surface level acts of self love; you won’t experience real change within.
Because self love runs much deeper than that.
It’s about doing loving things for your mind, body and soul. It’s about putting you and your needs first for a change, and being selfish. Because it’s okay to think about yourself sometimes, despite what we’re often taught as women.
And by committing to these powerful acts of self love, you’re giving society the middle finger, and learning to love and celebrate the woman you already are.
Because it’s not about changing who you are, or trying to fit in. It’s about recognising and believing you’re already enough.
Even if you commit to doing just one of these every day, you’ll begin to notice subtle and deep shifts within.
Some of these powerful acts of self love are small, while others are more elaborate. Some are totally free, while others are indulgent. I’ve tried to include a balance to suit everyone.
If there’s one that instinctively speaks to your soul, then you might begin there. Or if there’s one that scares you, it could be beautiful to lean in to your fear and see what happens when you do.
35 powerful acts of self love that will help you learn to love yourself more:
- Start a gratitude journal and commit to writing down at least three things you’re grateful for each day.
- Say no without guilt.
- Say yes without fear.
- Give yourself time and space to meditate as little or as long as you like at the start of each day.
- Tell someone you love how much they mean to you.
- Write yourself a love letter, and be reminded of all the beauty that exists between your bones.
- Indulge in a massage, facial, or spa day; as a thank you to your body for all she does for you.
- Write a celebration list, of everything you’re proud of accomplishing in your life so far. No matter how small or big. Read it back to yourself, and drink it in.
- Prepare and cook yourself a delicious meal from scratch.
- Create a self-love playlist, filled with songs and music that make you feel warm and fuzzy on the inside.
- Be in water. Drive to a pool, lake, or the ocean. Swim. Feel your worries and stress wash away, as you’re held by her.
- End a relationship with someone who makes you feel like you’re not enough.
- Unplug for a while. Switch off your phone, and don’t open your laptop. For as long as you choose. And enjoy being disconnected.
- Go outside and plant your bare feet on the earth. Breathe in fresh air. Feel connected to Mumma nature, and all her beauty.
- When you’re bleeding, take extra rest if your body needs it. Stay in bed longer. Cancel plans. Do nothing but rest and replenish your energy. Know that this does not make you weak.
- Smile and say something positive every time you catch your reflection in a mirror.
- Watch an inspiring movie, or listen to an inspiring podcast.
- Pour yourself your drink of choice in your favourite mug or glass, and curl up somewhere cosy with a book.
- Buy yourself a gorgeous bouquet of your favourite flowers. Arrange them in a lovely vase, and put them somewhere you’ll see them every day.
- Donate any items and possessions in your house that no longer bring you joy when you look at them.
- When it’s sunny, go outside and bask in the sunshine for a little while.
- Run yourself a bath with salts, and flower petals. Light a candle, and put on some calming music. And relax.
- Buy yourself a super soft and beautiful set of bed sheets, that make you feel like you’re sleeping on a bed of clouds.
- Dance and bathe in the moonlight at full moon.
- Share how you’re really feeling with someone.
- Go somewhere you’ve never been before, and explore.
- Open all the windows and doors in your home, and use sage to clear away any negative or stuck energy. Welcome in the new.
- Cry when you need to, and don’t apologise for it.
- Tune into your intuition, and trust your inner guidance. She won’t steer you wrong.
- Reflect and write, about anything and everything.
- Receive a compliment from someone. Don’t shrug it off, and don’t cancel it out by immediately giving them a compliment back. Just enjoy receiving.
- Buy a large piece of card or a pin board, and create your own intention board. Fill it with images and quotes that light you up, and evoke how you desire to feel, and what you want to manifest.
- Think about what you loved doing as a child, and pick one of those things to do today.
- Do something you’ve always wanted to do, but haven’t done out of fear.
- Celebrate something you’ve accomplished recently.
Pick one of these powerful acts of self love and commit to doing it today. Pick another one, and do it tomorrow. Keep going. Feel into what has the most impact on you. Create your own list. Have fun with it.
Make a promise to yourself right now, to show yourself love every single day from today onward.
Because you deserve it, my love.