I want you to know it’s okay to not have the next 10 years of your life mapped out, to not have a plan, and to not know what you want to do with your time here.
So many of us, particularly in our twenties, feel an immense amount of pressure to define who we are and where we’re going. We look around, and allow ourselves to get wrapped up in the illusion of other people’s lives; always the “successful” ones. The ones who are climbing the corporate career ladder, starting businesses, buying houses, getting married, and having babies.
We’ve convinced ourselves these people are successful. They’re moving forward in their lives. They know what they want, and they’re pursuing it and claiming it. In other words, they’re doing everything we’re not doing, and they have all the things we don’t have.
Some of us are incredibly lucky to know what we want to do for the rest of our lives before we’re done with school. But most of us are not. And many of us step onto the treadmill, running as fast as we can; without even pausing to take a breath and look around.
We end up in jobs, relationships, and towns that we didn’t necessarily choose or dream for ourselves; they just, kind of, happened. And because we didn’t slow down, or ask ourselves if this is what we really want, we said yes by default. All of a sudden, it feels too late to turn around, to say no, to change your mind.
This is how many people feel, even if they don’t voice it.
Even if they act as though they’re happy, and life is good, and they’re content with their choices. Because they’re not ready to embrace their truth; or they’re not ready to let the people around them see their truth.
The people in life who seem to have everything figured out, may well do, and may well not. You can’t ever really say. So why waste time pondering it, or dwelling on it? It makes no difference to the life you are living.
Feeling lost and unsure is a wonderful thing. It means you’re not content with the status quo, or living a life that is less than extraordinary. It means you’re searching for the true path you’re meant to take; your soul path. And you’re leaving behind anything that does not serve or support you, in pursuit of what does.
Is there anything more daring, more inspiring, or more beautiful than this?
Being in a rush to define your purpose here is not for you; it’s for them. It’s to please or impress or sedate the people around you. In your heart, I think you know that labels and titles are meaningless. It’s how you feel each day that counts. And chances are, if you’re here, you want to feel good. You’re not willing to settle for dull, mediocre, or soul-destroying. You want to live a life that brings you joy and fulfilment and adventure every day.
Searching, trying, failing, re-starting, and feeling lost are all a part of this process. This is sometimes what it takes to find whatever it is you’re searching for. To create a life that means something to you, and aligns with your soul desires. It’s not meant to be easy; because otherwise you wouldn’t be forced to learn anything, to push your self-imposed limits, or grow.
So, if you’re still feeling lost, it’s because you’re not done yet.
You haven’t found whatever it is you’re looking for. And that’s okay. There is no rush. This is not a race. Keep looking. Keep challenging your own boundaries, keep learning, and keep growing. Do more of the things you love, and try new things that call you. Take risks, give yourself permission to fail, and always pick yourself back up and try again.
Whatever is meant for you will be waiting there for you to embrace it.
Having a plan is nice, but life rarely goes according to plan. And it’s not nearly as fun when we follow a map the entire way. It doesn’t leave room for you to change, or evolve. It doesn’t leave room for spontaneous detours, or unexpected encounters, or beautiful miracles, which are on their way.