You Cannot Love Someone Into Loving You

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Photo by Marco Perretta on Unsplash

One of the hardest lessons I have had to learn, and am still learning, is that you cannot chase someone who simply does not want to be caught up with.

You cannot try and make yourself appear more worthy or confident or more beautiful, in the hopes that they will finally see just how amazing you are. You cannot show up for a person with every inch of your soul; whilst they are not willing to give you even the tiniest piece of theirs.

You cannot pocket the dimples that are imprinted within their cheeks when they smile, even though it fills your body with ardour. You cannot pocket the sound of their voice when they laugh; or the twinkle that appears deep within their eyes on even the cloudiest of days. You cannot pocket the way their grin stretches from ear to ear when you sing or the way that magic completely consumes you whilst you are with them. And you cannot pocket the way their fingertips feel whilst entwined within yours, in the hopes that they will do the same for you too.

You cannot fight to be with somebody who is already equipped with swords and daggers and shields; with the expectancy that they will put them down. You cannot fight to be with the kind of person who will only end up sitting back and watching whilst you bleed; who is only fixated on patching up their own wounds.

You cannot build a home within a person who is only looking to rent out your heart for a short while; who simply wants you for nothing more than to fill a void within their own self. Because to build a home within another being before you do yourself, means you are unloading all of your heart and soul, and your beauty and baggage all at once; in the hopes that this other person will simply make room.

You cannot love someone into loving you.

Because the truth is, you do not deserve to be with someone who can only love you in small amounts. You deserve to take up space. You deserve to be looked at in awe and in wonder and beauty because you are art. The kind of art that sends shivers down spines and has hearts beating with so much contentment. You’re art and that needs to be treasured, so do not let anybody treat you like you are ordinary; no matter how deeply your heart longs for them.

You deserve to find true love. The kind made up with the feeling of being home. The kind that feels like you are floating in an ocean of stardust; that still twinkles even in the darkest of parts. You deserve to be seen and to be read like poetry; to have another being explore the deepest depths of your soul and still choose you every single time. You deserve to be held and to be guided and cherished with so much conviction; so much that you won’t have to be confused or filled with worry on where you stand.

You deserve for someone to choose you just as whole heartedly as you choose them.

So please, do not settle for anything less than you deserve.

Learn to walk away from anyone and anything that does not leave you in a state of pure happiness. Learn to take care of your own heart; your own soul. Learn to be your own saviour. And with that, learn to be patient and wait for the right person to come along and show you why all the others had to leave.

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