You’re frozen in a moment, stuck because you’ve experienced something so bad; a loss, grief, a life-threatening illness, or failure, but the world still moves on around you. It’s so strange to see people move past you, through you, and around you, at full speed, when your life has come to a standstill.
That’s because life goes on, regardless of what you’re going through. There’s no stopping it. It keeps moving, with glaring signals that you should keep moving too.
But in that moment, you find it too hard to give anything to the world, to life, to the people around you. All you have are flashes of memories of a time where life offered achievable happiness and endless possibilities. Lost in that moment in time, it seems impossible to put one foot in front of the other and move forward.
Someone you love may have passed on. With the loss of a life so precious to you, you expected the world to stand still while you dealt with your shock and heartache. But it didn’t stop for you to grieve. It kept right on moving as if your world hadn’t just shattered.
You may have left your job where you thought you were making a valuable contribution. Leaving years of hard work behind you and the people that were a part of your daily life. Maybe you thought that your absence would be felt long after you were gone. Only to realize that the company didn’t stop running without you. Your colleagues just got on with their jobs without you.
Life simply went on, without you.
And that’s just it. No matter what happens to you and in your world, life goes on.
Experiences like death, grief, loss, heartache, break-ups, embarrassment are almost guaranteed in your life. As much as they are extraordinary things that are happening to you, they are ordinary things in a life.
In those moments, while your heart hurts and your soul is crushed, it is hard to believe that somewhere in your future, there will be opportunities for laughter, love, success, and happiness again.
In a favorite quote of mine by Robert Frost, he says:
“In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: It goes on.”
Change happens, things will rarely stay the same in your lifetime. Inevitably, life goes on, with or without you. It is up to you to choose whether to follow or remain locked in the past, thinking of what could have been.
Here’s the thing, it is not easy to stop dwelling on the negative things that have happened to you. It can be a challenge in those defeated times to believe there will be better days ahead.
Take the time needed to process the changes you’re experiencing. Try to make peace with these changes and finally, learn to live with them. Moving on from despair, disappointment and heartache takes a willingness to step out of the darkness to live your life in the light again.
There’s a time and a place for everything, both good and bad. At the end of a trying path, may you be open to opportunities when they present themselves. When it’s your time to rise up, don’t let it pass you by.
Choose to live your life. Look forward to your future and all its possibilities, in honor and memory of all you have lost and endured.